bananas are GOOD [John]

[The Doctor]

He never got drunk. He never went to bars to get drunk. He never sat at a barstool singing old Irish drinking songs until now. The Doctor lolled upon his stool sipping a banana daiquiri. He was light headed and hearts broken all over Rose. He just confessed that he loved her and couldn’t be with her because of old Gallifrain laws. Stupid laws that held him down, he couldn’t just ignore them like he did with everything else. He owed Gallifrey that much as he destroyed the place. The Doctor felt horrible about the whole thing. Rose said she wanted some time to think, she suggested he needed the same; time to think. However the honest truth was the Doctor had made up his mind a long time ago, he wanted to be with Rose.

So why he here then? It was Rose you see, because she wanted some more time to think about this. She was the one who once told him that she wanted to be with him forever. But, no, things didn’t work out like that. Things happen for a reason. Sighing he finished off his sixth round of banana daiquiri. The pale yellow liquid settled down in his stomach and began soothing him. Raising a hand he ordered another one. The bartender hesitated to give the Doctor another one but he did never the less as the Doctor meekly explained to him he has high alcohol tolerance. This was true as Time Lords did, yet the Doctor was getting a little giddy.

“You know I don’t understand Humans sometimes. One day they tell you ‘I want to be with you forever.’ Then the next they tell you ‘I wanna think about it.’ What is that supposta to mean? I told her I loved her and that….” He hiccupped over his drink and took another sip muttering something to calm himself down. “Humans can’t live without them. Essential to the universal ecology.” He was talking out loud to himself. Not a good habit to have; most of the people in the room just though him drunk and slightly eccentric or perhaps mental. No matter, the various conversations in the pub went on. Life went on and the Doctor continued ranting on about Rose. He was on a tangent. Then someone stopped him, distracted him and pulled his full attention away from the subject of Rose.

[Captain John Hart]

John was sitting at the bar, lost in is own self-loathing. He wanted to be anywhere but Cardiff. Jack was in Cardiff, Grey had destroyed Cardiff and he had been a part of it all. That was something he hated, the disappointment and dismissal that Jack had shown him the last time he was here. Throughout all his life his only constant surviving thought had been of finding Jack and having him love him. When he realized it would never be he just died inside.

So, to fill the void that had grown inside him, he fell back on his all time favourites…drugs, alcohol, con-ing, murder, scandal, possibly a few well timed governmental overthrows and most importantly…sex.

Sex was his most favourite. It was his control, his master, his driving force. And speaking of, there was a really handsome bloke with wild hair and a sexy coat sitting just a few feet away and babbling to himself. He knew that man, just met him a few days earlier. He was the Doctor and at first John just wasn’t in the mood to waste his clever chat-up lines with the man but after listening, he thought…what the hell.

“You know I don’t understand Humans sometimes. One day they tell you ‘I want to be with you forever.’ Then the next they tell you ‘I wanna think about it.’ What is that supposta to mean? I told her I loved her and that….” the Doctor said, hiccupping and taking some more of his rather interesting drink. “Humans can’t live without them. Essential to the universal ecology.” He was talking out loud to himself.

John sidled up to him, dragging his Scotch along for the ride. “Seems to me you haven’t met the right human. We can be rather interesting to live with. I myself am a rather amazing human. The only one to survive after my colony was attacked. Makes me rather something, wouldn’t you say?”

He toasted the air with his glass, knocked it back and immediately ordered a refill. “Can’t imagine who would turn you down. You’re practically delicious in your own right.” He cast a sidelong glance at the Doctor.

[The Doctor]

Sex. It seemed to be the most essential thing in life. A lot of spices needed it for reproduction, others it was simply a part of the culture. The Doctor never really had the time to think about it much until now. Now when his TARDIS left him stranded in Cardiff, Wales. Now when Rose had to think about being with him when she traveled so far with him for so long. It broke his hearts. The Doctor couldn’t think straight. He needed to clear his head and let his thoughts free. Something about the drink before him soothed him and cleared his head. Bananas were good. Oh so very good.

“I feel in love with many Humans, I’ll have you know. Most leave me in the end. I think I said something, probably too much… I dunno if Rose is going to come back to me.” The Doctor confessed to the sort of stranger. After all he only met John a few days ago. He didn’t know much about him other than the fact that they knew the same Jack. For his response he shook his head. “I’m the only survivor of Gallifrey. That’s not amazing at all. It’s a load of pain and I hate it. I hate being what I am. I hate being the last of the Time Lords.” The Doctor admitted to the man. He usually never told anyone this but he was giddy and getting a little light headed. Words left his tongue without his brain processing them properly. Funny how the Doctor’s brain functioned when on his angsty emotional breakdown. “Oh don’t play the hero. I know that act. I used to do that. Doesn’t do anyone any good. Trust me.”

Smiling the Doctor looked at John for a moment. He was quite the player. Then he blushed at his last comment. “That’s not going to work with me. Playing that game. I know it, Koschy did that…” He trailed off as he recalled his youth. Classic flirt that was, John was pulling there and the Doctor was not stupid. Oh no, he was quite clever. But this time since Rose ran off he might eventually give in but it would take a lot more effort on the Captain’s part. “It was Rose. She just… she just… ran off. I guess I taught her that. Running. See I am always running. No matter, she said she wanted to think about us…. Said we both should think. Yet I know… I know I love her. I told her that. Yet…. It goes against all Time Lord laws. I can’t…. I already destroyed Gallifrey. Someone needs to keep the culture going. I’m the only one left.”

Tears filled in his eyes and he drank his drink hoping John wouldn’t notice his tears. It was a lot. The responsibility and all. The Doctor carried a heavy burden. He put down his drink as he couldn’t stomach the stuff anymore. He had a big lunch, and he told Rose a lot of things. Then she just left and he paid the bill and came here. “I must sound rather pathetic.” He noted.

[Captain John Hart]

John ordered another Scotch. It always seemed that he and the Doctor met in bars. To John that meant something. To everyone else it would be coincidence or happenstance. John didn’t believe in those things. He believed in fate.

The Doctor knew Jack. John’s heart belonged to Jack. Well, what was left of his heart. Most of it was blackened with sarcasm and hate, but the rest was completely Jack’s.

He would have given him his soul, if he had one left.

“I feel in love with many Humans, I’ll have you know. Most leave me in the end. I think I said something, probably too much… I dunno if Rose is going to come back to me.” The Doctor.

“Shame, that.” John looked off toward the mirrored back of the bar. “I try not to let anyone get too close, myself. Love is too bloody complicated.”

He listened as the Doctor said, “I’m the only survivor of Gallifrey. That’s not amazing at all. It’s a load of pain and I hate it. I hate being what I am. I hate being the last of the Time Lords.” The Doctor admitted.

“Yeah, forgot that bit of history. I was just some stupid kid who managed to not get eaten. No big shakes,” he said, feeling his own melancholy take over. This Doctor was not one for making a bloke feel good about himself.

“Oh don’t play the hero. I know that act. I used to do that. Doesn’t do anyone any good. Trust me.”

John looked at him. “No, that’s not me. Jack’s the hero. I’m the villain in the black hat. I’m the one who lurks in the shadows, the one parents use to scare their kids into submission. Heroes are over-rated and nowhere near as much fun.” He waved for another glass.

John listened once more as the Doctor spoke. “That’s not going to work with me. Playing that game. I know it, Koschy did that…” John looked at him with mock upset. “It was Rose. She just… she just… ran off. I guess I taught her that. Running. See I am always running. No matter, she said she wanted to think about us…. Said we both should think. Yet I know… I know I love her. I told her that. Yet…. It goes against all Time Lord laws. I can’t…. I already destroyed Gallifrey. Someone needs to keep the culture going. I’m the only one left.”

Believe it or not, John understood. The Doctor came from a long line of proud people. John didn’t even know where he came from. All he knew, from his research, was that his ‘people’ were scientist who were trying to breed the perfect human. They were attacked and he was the only true survivor. Even the ones he had managed to protect had eventually gone mad and/or died.

John was beyond madness and death was not an option for him.

He was pulled back to this world when he heard the pain in the Doctor’s words. “I must sound rather pathetic.”

John gave a mirthless snort. “You only sound pathetic if you feel that way. You have a right to be upset.” He gave the Doctor a side-glance. “You lot have two hearts, right? That gives you the right to be doubly hurt. More heart, more pain.” He knocked his drink back and ordered more for the both of them. “What are you drinking? Banana daiquiri? Let me try one of those.” He glanced at the Doctor with a smirk. “Rather phallic, the banana.”

[The Doctor]

It was sorta funny how the pair of them always seemed to meet in bars. The Doctor didn’t think much on it. Just believed that John was the sort to lurk in bars. As for himself, right now he really needed a drink, a banana daiquiri to be succinct as it made him feel better about everything. Yet they both had something in common: they both knew Captain Jack Harkness.

“You can say that again,” he told him as he took a long sip at his yellow tinted drink. It tasted good, comforting, and tasted so dam good. He gulped it down and looked mournfully at the empty glass. Somehow it tasted better when he brewed them up. The Doctor shifted in his seat upon the barstool. Quietly he mused to himself about the past day and all that was shared between him and Rose at the table. So many things have come to pass. Sighing he motioned for another drink.

The man had no idea what he was speaking about. “You wouldn’t know about it. No one does. Expect the select few I have told.” He realized that he have told him about it then lightly laughed at himself. “Oh right, I just told you. Heh.” Something was utterly humorous about this John Heart fellow. He couldn’t put his finger on what that was. “You don’t seem that type.” He finally said. “The villain I mean, you seem to far civil. Then again…. Looks can be deceiving.” The Master was rather civil on the outside and evil on the insides. But the Doctor wanted to make him better, and then he died. Life moved on. Perhaps John was like that, held a deep dark past or something. This made the Doctor want to naturally make him a better person.

Sure he couldn’t argue with that. Everyone had the right to express their feelings. So he felt upset. Let’s move on with it. Move on, two powerful words that even the Doctor had trouble with. He nodded. “I didn’t tell you that, however did you know?” Just how did the man know he had two hearts? Shaking his head he nodded. Yeah, it was a banana daiquiri. More like his seventh… or was it his eighth? Oh well. He lost track. He wasn’t drunk yet. Was that a world record, drinking eight banana daiquiris? Maybe it was universal one. The Doctor would look that up later.

“What can I say, bananas are good.”

[Captain John Hart]

The Doctor was sliding deeper into drunkenness and John was finding him more and more amusing. Jack had never told him of the Doctor and he felt a bit resentful that the man had known a Timelord and hadn’t even shared that bit of information. But then again, when could he have? When he was picking off Team Torchwood one by one or when he was blowing up Cardiff with Grey. Not much time for pillow-talk in those circumstances.

The Doctor seemed broody and out of sorts. John completely understood those feelings and ordered them both another round of daiquiris. He was beginning to like the taste of them, sweet and smooth and very banana-y.

The Timelord was rambling on about what John did and did not know. That was all right, he was a professional alcoholic and understood such melancholic yammering. But then he hit it on the head. Looks could be deceiving.

“I’ll tell you a secret. I tried to destroy Torchwood to find something that didn’t exist and then I managed to destroy Cardiff because Jack’s baby brother is a bit of a psycho. And that,” he said, tapping his nose with the tip of his finger, “is saying something because, me, I know psycho. Four rehabs to be exact.” He knocked back a mouthful of daiquiri. “Did you know they had a rehab for murder? It didn’t work, but still, they tried. Bless their poor misguided souls.”

He turned on his stool to look at the Doctor fully.

“Doctor, I’m a former Time Agent. It is our duty and responsibility to know all things about everything. One thing I remembered was that Timelords have two hearts. Two times the heartage for two times the breakage.”

He examined the man’s profile, his nose, his lips, his jaw. Without even realizing he was doing it, he licked his lips and leaned in, kissing the Doctor just below his ear. He leaned back, licking his lips and continued to drink his drink.

"Yup," he said, into his glass, "bananas are good."

[The Doctor]

Parler was a better word for what was really going on behind the curtain of speech. Parler was the French for 'to speak,' or 'to talk,' and boy oh boy was the Doctor speaking his head off. He could go on for hours if no one was there to hold him down and say something on the lines of 'Doctor, for once just shut it.' The Doctor couldn't help that he spoke to much, it was simply this current regeneration of his. He kept going on speaking like no tomorrow and it was not drunkenness, Time Lords were not too easy to get drunk, though if it were possibly he was growing to the point of ultimate giddiness.

"Oh Riley?" He arched an eyebrow showing his impression and amusement at the thought as it was just like the idea from dust to dust. From what created to it's destruction. "Well apparently I founded it cos they dubbed me a threat to the British Empire and technically banned me from it but, that doesn't stop me from coming back." The Doctor nodded thoughtfully, "Sure they had rehab for anything under the sun." A pause. "Perhaps I can help, I mean after all I am the Doctor and helping is what I do best."

"Ha!" He called out placing his glass hard on the table. "Impossible, even Time Lords don't know everything, I doubt you know everything. Nobody can, it takes the surprise out of surprises and adds spoilers which are no fun at all. It makes everything dull, exactly like Sundays."

Before he could do anything about it he was being kissed, his personal bubble invaded, and John kissed him just beneath his ear. The Doctor stood still on his stool and found himself blushing which he had not done for a long time.

Dam those fifty-first century phermones.

Gulping he managed to ask, "What was that for?"

[Captain John Hart]

John listened with only half an ear to the Doctor as he spoke of Time Lords and Riley, though he did catch that bit about him founding Torchwood. He filed that away for another time.

He was amused that the Doctor rambled on and on and still hadn’t reacted to the kiss he’d left on his jaw, the kiss he still felt on his lips. He wondered if he had gone romantic because slow was definitely not his speed.

John was rarely a gentle burn type of man. Oh, there had been times when a slow burn was what was needed, current circumstance as an example, but these times were rare and far between and not something he actually enjoyed. They were reserved for times when he wanted something that went beyond sex. Usually he worked hard and hot. John loved to slam a body against a wall, grind into it as he licked and bit their throat, listening to them moan uncontrollably, knowing he was the one in control and that thought is what got him off the most. Control.

This was different. This was a legendary Time Lord. He’d heard stories, myth told to small children at night. He’d also read the histories and couldn’t believe half of what he’d learned. The Time Lords were all gone.

Except they weren’t. There was a Time Lord sitting right next to him getting drunk and waxing rhapsodic. The only thing that would make him feel all squishy like this would perhaps be if Jack appeared with roses confessing his love and even then he’d probably just laugh at him before the fist-fight broke out.

Not to say he was in love. That was ludicrous. He didn’t love anyone, except Jack, and that was more of an obsession. He honestly didn’t even like himself all that much. (Ha! Take that Cooper and your ‘John Hart only loves John Hart’ bullocks).

But this was a Time Lord. How could you not gush? How could you not feel sticky sweet creamy centre feelings for a walking myth like that? And those brown eyes, really? I dare you to resist!

John’s actions seemed to finally sink in and he gulped and said, "What was that for?"

John tilted his head slightly, seeing the soft blush that coloured the other man’s cheeks. He licked his lips again, this time more predatory. “I was thinking to myself, here is a Time Lord and who was I to resist the urge to kiss him. What are the chances of my meeting another like you, or even you again?” He turned his body in his stool so he was fully facing the Doctor and gave him a smile. “Of course, keep acting the blushing bride and I’ll be forced to make sure you look properly debauched by the time I’m finished with you.” He winked, devilishly.

[The Doctor]

Kisses were kisses. In many cultures they were greetings. So the Doctor kept rambling on-- or was it his nerves that were acting up? He rambled on for a while about this or that or something else. John didn't make anymore moves so in the Doctor's book that had to mean something because he was from the 51st century when everything was about shagging on the spot and nothing to do with romance or love.

Yes, it was sad all the Time Lords were gone. It was now just the Doctor and he was alone. He hated being alone and it was nice to let his feelings out to this John fellow that he hardly knew in the pub. It was almost as good as traveling the universe with different faces and seeing there relations as he lead the tour or solved mysteries.

Smiling lightly he wondered if John was ok. He didn't look to good. Was it something he said? Did I say something?

[/color]

"Around zero..." [/color] he noted as he looked down in his seat and mused why he was flushing. "What are you talking about John, I'm not blushing. Your seeing things. Maybe you should get that checked out." [/color] He said gazing back at the man next to him. He was nervous and sputtering his words. They tumbled one over the other and didn't seem to go anywhere. John winked at him and he gulped once more.

"OK, fine, you win you caught me in the act. I can't help that your 51st century." [/color]

[[sorry this took so bloody long]][/blockquote]

[Captain John Hart]

"Around zero..." he noted as he looked down in his seat and mused why he was flushing. [o]"What are you talking about John, I'm not blushing. Your seeing things. Maybe you should get that checked out."[/I]

John only gave him a knowing smile.

"OK, fine, you win you caught me in the act. I can't help that your 51st century."

John smiled even brighter. “Really? I never would have believed that my pheromones would have an effect on a Time Lord. Well, bugger me,” he said, taking a sip of his drink.

He’d had his share of lovers. He had made it his mission to Shag His Way Across the Universe ™. Jack had once been apart of this elite mission but then he left the Time Agency, met the Doctor and went all noble. John knew that no matter what his intentions were toward the Doctor, the Time Lord would never change him. At least no knowingly. Though, he sorta understood why Jack had. Something about the Doctor made you want to be a better person. Even in his few experiences with the Doctor he could see that.

But not John Hart. He was a lone wolf, a rebel, a man looking for the next shag. He wouldn’t let a woman tie him down a Time Lord definitely couldn’t change his evil ways.

Oh, but to just touch, to taste those lips. Now that would be one for the mission books he kept for his Shag His Way Across the Universe™.

John was feeling rather smug and full of himself. “I really made a Time Lord blush. Something to be said about that. I feel…well, let me show you.” He took the Doctor by the chin, turning his face toward him and kissed him on the mouth, teasing and tempting, trying to get a reaction from the other man.